Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Seeing myself

Have you ever caught a glimpse of yourself in the mirror and thought "Is that really what I look like?" This happened to me yesterday as I was getting ready. Trying to manipulate my short hair into a ponytail, I caught a view of my profile and thought "Is that really me? I didn't know I looked like that on that side." It's kind of like hearing yourself on a recording and realizing your voice sounds different on the outside than the one you hear when you speak. It's weird.

And that just got me thinking. While it might be true that we know ourselves better than most everyone else, we don't always see ourselves as well as other people. We can't always see ourselves from other angles or hear ourselves without the internal reverberations. And those few moments when we do, sometimes we realize "That's not at all what I meant to be like."

Just as the hairstylist uses an extra mirror to show us all angles of our haircut, just as the fancy dressing rooms have the three mirrors instead of just one, and just as we need someone to tell us if those pants make our butts look big, I think we need someone to help us see how we are looking in other areas. Maybe those comments from a spouse about relaxing and slowing down aren't criticism but just a view from that side mirror. Maybe the suggestions to take something a bit more seriously or to not be so serious are just the help we need to see the whole picture.

Maybe if I stop taking myself so seriously I'd be able to accept the other viewpoints more gracefully. And then I can look at those viewpoints and say "Weird. I didn't see myself that way," and decide what I want to do about it. Just like you can't fix your hair when you can't see it, you can't fix yourself if you don't see it.

So, friends, how ya lookin'?

1 comment:

Jesse said...

I love this post. I have had many of those moments in the past few months, either seeing myself and doing a double-take, hearing myself and wondering why I said that, etc.

I think so often when we do catch a glimpse of something in ourselves that doesnt look how I think it should (aka: its the "ugly" me, if you get my drift), we attribute it to our external circumstances. "Well, I only snapped like that because I'm stressed," or "I have not taken care of my body because I'm too tired, due to ____."

Rarely do I say, "gosh, that was not pretty. I dont want to be like that, so I need to fix it!"

Personal responsibility.

And you are right, so often our perspectives are skewed due to the angle we see ourselves. How helpful to have a spouse, friend, or family member point out, in love, things we often dont see ourselves. God gave us people in our lives for a reason- what better than accountability?

Love the post. Thanks for reminding me to check my side mirror. :)